Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice (Ephesians 4:31).

After an agonizing separation from my husband and love of many years, I went through a devastating divorce. Battle-weary but still clinging to God's promises, I also had to help my nine-almost-ten-year-old daughter Tori watch her father leave God, leave our home, and most damaging of all--leave her. The rejection she felt couldn't be reconciled to her father still loving her and a God still loving her. After trying to "fix" my daughter's broken heart and failing, a good friend helped me understand that a child of divorce still has two parents.

Tori's love for her father is pure, innocent and unconditional. She needs him. She also needs my approval that it is good for her to love her Dad. To encourage her relationship with her Dad is hard. This means that I will face hurt over and over.

Getting rid of bitterness is nothing short of a miracle as there is no divorce without war and casualties. For a while, I could not get past the pain to help my girl be close to her Dad again.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interest, but also to the interest of others. Your attitude should be that of Jesus Christ: Who, being in the very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness (Philippians 2:3-7).

Only Jesus' example broke through. With Jesus, I can get past the hurt and make myself nothing. It is not easy. It is a never-ending sacrifice. I deny myself for God, for Tori, and for her Dad.

With prayer and help, I began to help foster Tori and her Dad's relationship. Today, Tori's father helps her with homework, takes her to piano lessons, and attends all parent conferences at school. My daughter feels loved by her father, and God has given her a hope for her Dad.

It starts with the small things. I have to be willing to be the one who drops off and picks up our daughter, even when it's not convenient. When something special happens, I always say, "Call Dad." After we pray about something sad, I say, "Call Dad." We pray for Dad everyday. Equally important, I always let Tori's Dad know what a great father I think he is. Helping him to be a good Dad and involving him in Tori's life changed everything.

It is only to God's glory that I help my daughter love her father, her father love her, and for her to learn to love through all circumstances.