The very BEST advice I got was actually from Dr. Phil. I think the VERY BEST advice anyone can give a soon-to-be married couple is to plan more for your life AFTER the wedding than for the wedding itself. I think there is WAY too much emphasis on the wedding day and not enough on the day after that and after that and after that. The wedding day is ONE day, and the marriage is the rest of your life. Focus on the marriage, NOT the wedding day.
-- Julia Chaffin, Las Vegas, NV
Serve together! Have dating couples and engaged couples over for meals and share with them. Go on "honeymoon vacations" to recapture the spark!
-- David Callahan, San Francisco, CA
One of the biggest mistakes I made in the beginning of our marriage was one I actually made during our engagement. As we discussed our marriage expectations, I held back and didn't mention my expectations of daily sexual intimacy. Considering that my husband had to get up at 3:30 a.m. three days a week, then work a 12-hour workday, my expectations were unrealistic (or at least required creative scheduling), but after we were married, I selfishly pushed my will. I also came into marriage with a very legalistic understanding of 1 Corinthians 7. The first six months of our marriage, we didn't make much effort to get help from other couples; we would individually talk with friends, but never sit down together to hash things out, so we started some very bad patterns. Our marriage suffered the consequences of my selfishness and rigidity for at least the first six years. We've come a long way since then, but I want to spare others what we went through, so I always urge my engaged friends to be as honest, open, and specific as they possibly can during their time of pre-marriage counseling.
-- A Wife in California